Tuesday, January 06, 2009

my 90210pinions: Hello, Goodbye, Amen

Oh this show sux. I did not miss it while it was gone, but I did forget how crappy it truly is. This episode didn't feature quite enough Naomi to be hilarious, just enough to be annoying.

Annie and Naomi battle to be best half-sister to new brother Sean. I hope Dan and Serena and Jenny and Eric don't have a half-brother bestie battle on Gossip Girl. oh wait they never would, that idea sux.

In class, we learn about INTUITION seeing without eyeballs.

Brenda has some mysterious ailment and is ALONE and also: crying. Silver is jealous of Dixon's new friend who is a hot girl. Audrina wants to invite Brenda to Rehab Times; Kelly agrees to call her. Oooooh.

Pictionary at the Wilson house! And also: Dr. Pepper. Sean sneaks out to take a secret phone call. You know what is scarier than having an imposter brother living in your house? Having Annie "Shanae Grimes" Wilson sneak up on you and be all, HEY BRO. She is such a big tattletale. And Sean is a big old liar; he says his adopted daddy was a gambler and killed himself to protect his son. DOUBT IT. It seems that Annie's INTUITION is telling her something is up. My intuition is telling me that Shenae Grimes is a terrible actor, especially when she has to have "sneaking suspicions."

Excellent Dialogue
Kelly: She sees you as a mother figure.
Brenda: I didn't ask for that.

Christina the Hot Cheerleader tries to talk music with Dixon while ensuring the Dr. Pepper logos get excellent coverage in every shot. Well done!

Silver is a total bitchface, making fun of the custodian and the cheerleader on her blog. But then Dixon totes lies to her. I see a relationship fail on its way!

Why is Naomi hanging out with her half-bro like he's her bf? I love that we required a flashback, within a half hour of an hour long show, to explain that Annie has a hunch that something is not right. When we had already been told that 100 times. Holy crapfestival.

Rehab is EASY! Adrianna is all better. And she makes Brenda realize the error of her ways. What: HIV scare! rehab is hard. HIV scare over! pregnancy ftw! another show too scared to say abortion?

Dixon goes to a black bev hills party, which includes such guests Dr. Dre and Kobe Bryant and Denzel Washington. Ahem. Phewf, Hot Girl Christina is a Lesbian (part-time). Break-up Fail. I was really ready for Silver and Dixon to be dunzo. Yawn. And now Dixon is singing Amazing Grace. Of course he is. Meanwhile Sean vaguely threatens Annie. YAWN.

Brenda can't have kids. Hmm, if only there was a baby someone didn't want.

Paternity test requested. Sean is gone. Family fail. Also logic fail on Naomi's part: how is it Annie's fault that her dumb mom gave the kid $200,000?

oh man this show is not even so-bad-it's-good anymore. I think I am officially dunzo with New 90210. maybe i'll watch the season finale and try to figure out what happened between this episode and the end of the season. that sounds like more fun than watching the show.

Goodbye. F is for Fail. :(

5 comments:

sarah k. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Adela P. said...

I didn't actually catch 90210 last night -- too busy rewatching season 2 of Kyle XY (and wooHOO I'm excited for season 3, btw!) -- but your post has made the decision for me: I no longer am going to watch this show! Yay for me finally having the strength to JUST SAY NO! ;-D (Really though, too many important premieres this Jan/Feb to make room for this garbage in my tv schedule, and on my DVR for that matter.)

I hope Dan and Serena and Jenny and Eric don't have a half-brother bestie battle on Gossip Girl. oh wait they never would, that idea sux.

This really made me laugh out loud. And you're so right, such a thing would NEVER happen on GG.

I love that we required a flashback, within a half hour of an hour long show...

Really?? That's awful.

Dixon goes to a black bev hills party, which includes such guests Dr. Dre and Kobe Bryant and Denzel Washington. Ahem.

PLEASE tell me these guys didn't actually make appearances on the nine-oh. Please?

Break-up Fail. I was really ready for Silver and Dixon to be dunzo. Yawn.

GAH. Yet another fail.

And now Dixon is singing Amazing Grace.

Wait, what?! Why??

Brenda can't have kids. Hmm, if only there was a baby someone didn't want.

HAHAHAHA. They can't go there, right? That's way too predictable and ridiculous. Ricockulous even.

maybe i'll watch the season finale and try to figure out what happened between this episode and the end of the season. that sounds like more fun than watching the show.

Sounds like what I'm going to do. Maybe when the season finale happens we can both speculate together as to what absurdness occurred in our absence.

But let's both stay strong! Goodbye to 90210 until then! Goodbye!

And hellllooo to some awesome new shows -- like Dollhouse and Castle... and the Lost premiere.... oh, and of course, Kyle XY! Yay for Jan/Feb tv seasons!!!

Crissy Calhoun said...

YES there was a flashback to previous scenes from the episode about 27 minutes into last night's 90210. FOR REAL.

the famous people were NOT actually on the show. They were just referred to. But if I was Dr. Dre, I would sue 90210. Do not use my good name for such evils.

i have no idea what Kyle XY is! to Google!

Adela P. said...

Oh man, you're missing out! Kyle XY is actually an ABC Family show, but it's made of awesome. Scifi-ish though, so if that's not your thing then you probably wouldn't be interested. But as much as it is about science-y stuff, it's just as much about family and relationships, and I'm very much in love! Usually they do a marathon on ABC Family of the previous season so you could at least get a tiny bit caught up if you wanted to. The season 3 premiere is January 12; I just bought the season 2 DVDs and am marathoning until then. Definitely catch a few eps if you have time! It looks like you can watch the eps here if you're interested:
http://www.cucirca.com/2007/06/23/watch-kyle-xy-online/

Adela P. said...

link got all screwy in the last comment. trying again here:

www.cucirca.com/2007/06/23/watch-kyle-xy-online

if it doesn't show up again, that link ends with the word "online" as I'm sure you've guessed. :-D