Friday, December 14, 2007

mind the gap: some randoms pour vous

i like salty snacks and pickled things and wonder why i'm always thirsty.

every morning this week i missed a streetcar by mere seconds.

i am reading A Week of This written by a very smrt and funny man and one day soon you'll get to too.

cold veggie dogs + mustard = not as gross as it sounds.

ordering things from the internet means excellent packages arrive at your home and you get to look at the excellent contents even if you will be giving them away shortly. mail is the best. it's also a relief to know that things (in my vair limited experience) look as good at home as they do on etsy.

i had the pleasure of chatting with a guy from Dark Horse (they of the Buffy Season 8 comic) at the cocktail party post-sales conference the other night. guess how cool that was. (correct.)

in very few minutes (i should really get out the door now christ almighty), i am
going here and will also see this one in addition to a bevy of other brill ladies who are blogless and thus linkless. sarah d., it's time. in fact overdue.

Friday, December 07, 2007

Reading in Bed

who’s in a bad mood who’s in a taxi turning the clock back avoiding a fight with this man he is meeting stands in the lobby counting his questions in the neon light sinking under the river the sewer line touches the edge of the suburbs back to the beach where a family is waiting on rumors of summer lay out a blanket

bring something to feed the birds

with all the luck you’ve had why are your songs so sad you sing from a book you were reading in bed and took to heart all of your lives unled reading in bed


(from knives don't have your back, emily haines & the soft skeleton
)

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

*blackout* (not the Britney album)

hey y'all. i've gots power over here at my place. you? driving home with sarah d. was an adventure — the streets were vair dark along gerrard. country dark. sunnydale at the end of days dark. but all the lights are ablaze in my apartment and gossip girl will not go unwatched. phew.

now (re)reading: The Golden Compass, in preparation for the film vers, obvs. (who has time for typing out whole words?) and the TPL just lent me the aforementioned Shock Doctrine and No One Belongs Here More Than You. I know it's old news but if you haven't looked at the latter's brill website you should right now.

in other news, what the frak is for dinner?

in other other news, the BSG tv movie Razor was NOT THAT GREAT. I know! I never feel that way about the BSG. (Except for that shitty documentary-style talking to the cameras bullshit phone-it-in episode. I didn't like that one.) Razor definitely picked up in the second hour but I missed the focus being on the BSGers I know and love and the main plotline (where the frak is Earth and when will the Cylons leave us alone?). The last five minutes make the whole thing worth watching tho. Duh-duh-duh is how it makes you feel.

also you should know that i am one of those people they talk about on the news who is doing more online shopping from u.s. stores (but only good folksy ones). speaking of, i have some stuff i need to purchase... and some tea to make and then sip and slurp.

Friday, November 23, 2007

1 book, 2 book, 3 book, 4

I have been lax in reporting on my reading of late — most notable omissions = The God Delusion and Persepolis. Both of which come with the Calhoun Stamp of Approval. Getting almost all of my books from the Toronto Public Library can be both a blessing and a curse for at the moment I have nothing to read (that isn't already on my shelf languishing) and I just know that there will be an unreadable amount of books ready for me all at once. That's when I find out which ones I really want to read (Click) and which ones I think I should read (The Shock Doctrine).

100 Notable Books of the Year, according to the New York Times
And of those 100, I have read just one (erm, Harry Potter) and have one on my shelf unread (Leonard Woolf: A Biography). There are several on the list I'd like to read (After Dark, The View from Castle Rock, Yiddish Policemen's Union) and others I would never (The Diana Chronicles). And you?

Thursday, November 22, 2007

errr...less inspiring form of precipitation?

snowflakes keep falling on my head

it's snowing, it's blowing, the old man is snoring
he bumped his head and went to bed
and didn't get up in the morning

so if you want to love me
then darlin don't refrain
or else i'll just end up walkin
in the cold november snow

it's snowing. snowing. ooh baby it's snowing.
snowing.
you can always come into me,
come into me.

Let the snowy clouds chase
Everyone from the place
Come on with the snow
I've a smile on my face

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

hyades

raindrops keep falling on my head

it's raining, it's pouring, the old man is snoring
he bumped his head and went to bed
and didn't get up in the morning

so if you want to love me
then darlin don't refrain
or else i'll just end up walkin
in the cold november rain

it's raining. raining. ooh baby it's raining.
raining.
you can always come into me,
come into me.

Let the stormy clouds chase
Everyone from the place
Come on with the rain
I've a smile on my face

Monday, November 19, 2007

clean up your act.

home home after a quiet day's work — bookkeeping and deciphering scrawled notes on track-changes document. the folks at grocery gateway will be here sooner or later with my order. let's cross our fingers for sooner. the quality of my dinner will be much much higher.

i am thinking vair seriously about getting a kitten (!) if you can believe it. last night we had a hang out, the kitten and i, and there were no sneezes or itchy eyes. i've been okay with lotsa cats lately (like in the past couple of years); but a giant pile of cat hair will still get me. how awesome would it be to have a kitten and then later a cat!? i could have this wee guy til i was in my forties! and i will have to dream up a glorious name...

Friday, November 09, 2007

Scabby McScab

the United Hollywood blog is pure edutainment, to use a non-word I loath more than honey on a shrimp cheesecake. you learn about the WGA strike; there are videos featuring your fabbity fav TV actor/writers and writer/producers, links to other amusing strike coverage, and gems like the following address to scabs,


When the producer looks at you, he or she sees -- and this is a legal term -- a miserable opportunistic leech. Once the strike is settled, do you really think your producer wants you around, Scabby McScab? If nothing else, you're a reminder of The Troubles. You're like a tattoo with a typo obtained during a bachelorette party that took a bad turn after the Bacardi Breezers ran out. You will be removed.

Learn about why the writers are striking here. Sign the petition in support of the WGA here.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Wolfie and the Sneak Love Me

what could it be? from dear darling sweetheart sharelley! look at those cupcakes on the paper! check out the added bonus pencil! w-wait...what is this? elton at bat? phew. also: love.
more beautiful things here. i love wolfie and the sneak. and according to my new pencil, wolfie and the sneak love me right back.

Saturday, November 03, 2007

Pink Is the New Funny

i've managed to reduce my celebrity news intake down to almost nothing. however, i find it *very* difficult not to check in on Britney. the place I go also happens to share my feelings on this season of Heroes. peep this*:


*i'm trying hard to work "peep" and "haters" and some other words Kanye frequently uses into my speech/writing. i think it's working so far. i swear that guy's
blog is fascinating. conversation w/ kanye would be an interesting venture.

Friday, November 02, 2007

Featuring a New Feature!

As requested by the brother to Sharelle (he doesn't have a blog and therefore the link goes to the next of kin), I've added the power of FeedBlitz to the Tribune. It's down there on the right hand side. You can subscribe and get an email when I post! No more checking the blog only to find I haven't posted anything in days . . . no more tears for you.

I use Google Reader and subscribe to all of my blogs there. Currently I have 78 unread items. I just leave it open all day so I know the moment the new Dinosaur Comic is posted. Speaking of T-Rex and his friends, peep this recent moment of hilarity, from the Things to Say When Someone Has Broken Up With You comic:

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

If You Are Who You Say You Are...

Let's continue with new & beloved music week at the Tribune. Kanye, my favourite new(-to-me) blogger, introduced me to Lupe Fiasco's "Superstar." With rhymes like these, why resist? It's like ha ha hahaha....

So just take me home where the mood is mellow
And the roses are thrown
M&M's are yellow
And the light bulbs around my mirror don't flicker
Everybody gets a nice autograph picture
One for you and one for your sister
Who had to work tonight but is an avid listener
Every song's a favorite song
And mikes don't feed back
All the reviewers say you need to go and see that
And everybody claps cuz everybody is pleased
Then they all take the stage and start performing for me
Like ha ha hahaha
Ha ha hahaha ha


Tuesday, October 30, 2007

You Wanna A Piece of Me?

Well, hello.

I am listening to Britney's new album
Blackout — so far, so f'n good.

Thankfully they've finally launched her new website, with a spot for everyone's favourite part of fandom.

How happy am I that after her well-documented private-life fiascos, Brit's album is a winner? Very happy.

Makes me hopeful that one day I may attend Britney #8, and she sure does put on a good live (if mostly lip-synched) show.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

"Tell 'em all Daisy's change' her mine."

Kerry on books in the bath and baths in books here. The only bath scene I remember is Daisy in The Great Gatsby with Gatsby's letter. Funny — just looked it up and it's barely a scene, more a moment:

She began to cry—she cried and cried. I rushed out and found her mother's maid and we locked the door and got her into a cold bath. She wouldn't let go of the letter. She took it into the tub with her and squeezed it up into a wet ball and only let me leave it in the soap dish when she saw that it was coming to pieces like snow.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

lunettes

who hates the google chat donk noise? i do. i do.

i thought up quite a few things I wanted to tell you about and now that I'm ready to type 'em up, my mind has gone blank.

.......


oh. Tori Amos concert on tuesday at the hummingbird centre. the set list is here and maybe you'll note that it's entirely great songs that I love. Including three from From the Choirgirl Hotel -- one of my most treasured perfect albums of all time. There was a wonderful moment (in "winter") where she was singing a quiet bit and the audience was all hushed and enraptured -- then some jackass completely ruins it yelling out, "I love you Tori!" And his buddy yells, "Jason loves you too!" To which Tori replies, in a whisper, "Eat me." It was glorious. Erin bought the official bootleg (i know, oxymoron, right?) and I'm listening to that song right now. Brills. I'm going to bootleg it from her. So it earns its name proper.

That was my fourth Tori A. concert. She's still shy of my 7 Britneys, tied with U2 (but I'm done with them so she'll lap 'em soon), nearly at the 5 Rolling Stones, already far past the 2 Paula Abduls.

Time to clean up. Our 25-year-old dishwasher is broken so for the time being, the 28-year-old dishwasher is being put to work.

Also: I think it's time to name the raccoons that watch me watch TV. Suggestions? They're pretty cute for destructive garbage eating vermin, so keep that in mind.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Makes Me So Holy



(thanks Clairey. you made my day times a million.)

Say I'll Be There


Holler! Erino, S'rain and I will be spicing it up here in Toronto. Doesn't seem right without Clazza, does it?, so I'll make a dolly version of her and bring it along. I wonder if they'll do "Wannabe."

And as Erin said, I hope Geri doesn't break up the band before February.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Not Bad, Britters

I know all of y'all are supporters of our dear Britney, so I thought I'd let you know you can preview the new album, Blackout, here. Ecouter tous les titres.

No crappy ballad (no ballads at all it seems), no cover song, and no filler as far as I can tell -- a first in Brit album history. Now all we need is to improve on the videos. Higher concept than "stripper."

found: homework

found on the way home, on king just before church, dirty run over homework, some answers starred, who knows why. my favourite is #37.

*23. like I like to go to the movies.
*24. love I love to go to operas.
25. manage She managed to finish her work early.
26. mean I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.
27. need I need to have your opinion.
28. offer They offered to help us.
29. plan I am planning to have a party.
*30. prefer Ann prefers to walk to work.
31. prepare We prepared to welcome them.
32. pretend He pretends not to understand.
33. promise I promise not to be late.
34. refuse I refuse to believe his story.
*35. regret I regret to tell you that you failed.
*36. remember I remembered to lock the door.
37. seem That cat seems to be friendly.
*38. can't stand I can't stand to wait in long lines.
*39. start It started to rain.
40. struggle I struggled to stay awake.
41. swear She swore to tell the truth.
42. threaten She threaten to tell my parents.
*43. try I'm trying to learn English.
44. He volunteered to help us.

Friday, October 19, 2007

recipe

All they sell in Edmonton grocery stores:
1. Butter
2. Beef
Combine 1 and 2 to frighten S & C.


home again



i miss edmonton.

Monday, October 15, 2007

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Live from Alberta

I'm in Edmonton! For the very first time. Lovely. I ate beef already! It tasted tasty. Wanna know something weird about steakhouses in Edmonton? And maybe other places too but S'rain & I had never heard of this before: they put a giant slab of BUTTER on your meat. My plate arrived and there was (what I thought was) a nice sizeable piece of bocconcini atop the steak, with some herb artfully stuck in like a Chrimbo tree.

Not cheese. Butter. I managed to deftly and swiftly remove it so I have not yet scheduled my exploratory heart surgery. Mother of God, says I.

So far I've taken a bunch of pictures but with my cell phone for y'all. I have to do some bluetoothing somewheres to show them to you. So expect a photo heavy blog entry; its thesis question is, Pearson Airport Terminal 1: Better than Nuit Blanche?

My sister says hi and I'm about to eat room service (of which I am taking a picture). Oh for a laugh, go to the website for Ruth's Chris Steakhouse (not where we went for steak) and turn on your speakers. Listen to the sizzle.

Saturday, October 06, 2007

How strangers find my blog. A sample.

A U.K. resident did a google search for "hate the abbreviation crimbo." Poor soul was led here, where I lovingly use the word "crimbo," and later hated some other abbreviation. (also just noticed, I've taken to spelling it with an H now. i wonder which is correct. must consult my Georgia Nicholson.)

I'm not even on the first pages of results (I gave up after 12) but eventually you will find the Tribune whilst googling the very excellent topic,
"Office Haikus."


Oh you Brits. Another U.K. resident (or I suppose it could be the same one) arrived
here by searching for the phrase, "i took a lude." Brilliant to the max and past the limit.
Yikes-o-rama. Someone with different interests arrived here (I assume) doing a google blog search for "boy piss." I am not, not surprisingly, one of the top search results. Glance at the photo evidence for some indication of what comes up.


Another
lude! This one from Canada. I wonder if people searching the phrase, "I took a lude," have in fact just taken a lude and are at home googling, searching for a discussion board or chattyroom. Hello future lude-takers! Warmest greetings from the Calhouninator. Your comments are welcome — why are you googling "I took a lude"? Inquiring minds want to know.


Friday, October 05, 2007

Thursday, October 04, 2007

when the tv is off

things have been very tv-centric here at the Tribune. i also do other things sometimes (not often) and enjoy them (for the most part).

Now reading: The Outlander by Gil Adamson
I gleefully announce that I actually know this mighty fine wordsmith as she is a longtime superstar freelance editor for ECW. However, until picking up The Outlander, all I had read of her writing were emails and funny post-its stuck to manuscripts (they get vair funny; Jen often has to share Gil's brilliance with me). Now I'm only 96 pages in but lemme tell ya what I know so far: I like it. A lot. The tiny details and the big picture — all captivating. You know when you read a sentence and you're like, "That's just right and I've felt that & known it but never thought to phrase it just like that, perfectly"? That plus the story just compels you forward, to find out about our main girl.

And the latest issue of Shameless arrived in the mail the other day. So double bonus bells for me.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

judging the chart: B+

just seconds after ANTM finished, the wikipedia chart was updated! mere seconds! however, when i first went to the page the colour coding of challenge winner & cover girl of the week was not yet there. i had to refresh the page.

so a B+ for the chart this week. be fiercer next week.


tvesday night

through the power of time-shifting, i managed to watch FOUR hours of quality programming. here is my tvesday night report.

7 p.m. GOSSIP GIRL This show continues to be excellent. Thank you again trashy teen novels for providing such fodder. Last night, we learned that even if you're handed your shiny future on a silver platter, life is tough and totes not fair. You don't want to go to your dad's alma mater, you wanna go to USC. Boooo. The scene at the end with Blair and Serena in Central Park, in the rain, with a big floppy hat on the blonde one (who dresses this girl?) was sad rich-girl friendship at its glorious best. I got misty. For reals.


8 p.m. THE TUDORS
Here's where I got tricksy and watched the Maritime feed. The Tudors = vair good and not just for looking at Henry VIII. But that is a good part. Some Canadians in that show — including one guy who I see 'round town and Henry Czerny, who totally went to the same high school as me and the teachers always made a big whoop about it.


9 p.m. HOUSE
Better than the season premiere, I'd say. I liked the gang of potentials and really don't miss House's regular crew. Glad to see he was back to popping his Vicodin and that the writers could make more than just one joke per episode. Wilson is still getting on my nerves though. But better than anything else is FAN ART. Thank you dedicated
artist-fan.



10 p.m. PUSHING DAISIES

Yay for the new show. Great narration. Beautiful super-colour-saturation. Charming leads. Excellent character (Charlotte "Chuck" Charles) and place names (The Pie Hole). Morbid and romantic. Two of my favourite things. With the added bonus of the aunts' former profession: synchronized swimmers. Please watch this show so it doesn't get cancelled. Thank you.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Lunch Break.

Guess what time of the year it is at ECW? Books comin' back from the printer time of year. They are sooooo pretty and new. Finding Lost: Season 3 just arrived mere half-hours ago and it's just perfect. Last week we got our two fall poetry titles and the paper is tres beauteous (oh and the words inside). And of course, Erin's cover design worked out just right for our Heroes book.




In other news, I am testdriving some new tv shows this fall. One I tried to resist but it's so bad it's good and I can't look away. That one is Gossip Girl. Oops. I know it's awful. But wickedly watchable. It's on tonight and I cannot wait. Oops. I tried Journeyman last night and found that I really don't care about people helping people through time travel adventures. Unless your name is Dr. Who. While I was cooking some delicious ratatouille last night (which I am eating this very second), I decided to watch a seriously crap show called Big Shots. It's a show about four asshole CEOs. They have problems. With women. We can be such stereotypical pests all the time, can't we ladies? The pilot featured a running joke about one guy getting caught with a transvestite prostitute. Ohmigod. Can you even believe such hilarity and risque saucy talk? AHHHH. I vote for cancellation. Immediately.

Heroes was better last night than the week before. It featured such excellent moments as: Claire cutting off her own toe; Peter greased up and beat up (shirtless and someone sure spent their hiatus at the gym); a cool transition effect with Mohinder going from Haiti to that annoying guy's office in one shot; a brief moment when I thought the annoying Kensei was actually killed off; no Niki/Jessica — second week in a row! Boo on: the two new plots of tracing the mysterious spreading virus and tracking down the other 7 (8?) paintings. I want more Sylar and brain snatching! And when does everyone's favourite girl detective, Veronica Mars, show up? Soon I hope. (In the meantime I get my VMars from Gossip Girl.)

My earrings are little zebra heads. And they come all the way from Zimbabwe. Zimbabwe Zebras.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

oh wikipedia

This chart makes me laugh & laugh. Someone took the time to make a colour-coded chart to track the progress of the models on ANTM, Cycle 9, and plans to promptly update post-episodes. I think I'll track the chart's progress.

Thursday, September 27, 2007

piss and vinegar

i leave my computer overnight at work lotsa days. that means no bloggery. so, sorry about that. i guess.

today's dinosaur comic is particularly hilarious. maybe cause of the pointing? i am not sure. (if you click on it, you'll be able to read the whole thing. or maybe it's just my screen that is cutting off part of the funny.)
the idea with the wallet thing is that if someone asks you the difference between ethics and morals you can just throw your wallet at them and say 'IT'S IN THERE'

soon i am going to my friend's house for supper + the office.

tomorrow is Claire's birthday. she will be elderly. she will soon require people to help her cross the road.

I read Clay by David Almond since the library was kind enough to lend it to me. It's not like Skellig (except for the boy protagonist whose life changes when he encounters a strange magical stranger); it's more grown-up and monstrous. But bliddy good. Now reading Winkie, and Jen was right.

And finally, I have been in a serious grump all week long (maybe two weeks?). Misery coating on everything. But please don't ask why cause there is nothing that i can properly articulate and i don't wanna lie to you.

Shake it off, shake it off: The Office. Nuit Blanche. Bluegrass Brunch with people I haven't seen in 10 years. Edmonton? And best of all, new baby new baby new baby.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Introducing Tabitha Soxfield

I've invented some pretty decent aliases over the years; Georgia Tot Sint Jans comes to mind, as does the #1 champion last name of Calhoun. And I have a new one (inspired in part by the Grocery Gateway delivery person): Tabitha Soxfield. I'm not sure yet what I'm going to do with that name, but something. It's just marvy. And a google search came up empty-handed (did I mean Tabitha Foxfield? nope.) so it's mine all mine.

News: Had my first ballet class with Sarah D. We both did very well (she is better at the ballet technique, and so on) and I am sooooo glad we are going. My life has already improved by a million. (That is a serious exaggeration.)

Books: Just finished Skellig by David Almond...I've read several books for young'uns lately, and I think this one takes the cake. It's such a straightforward book about the most extraordinary things; you just march along between the sadly realistic and the realistically fantastical. Claire tells me a film adaptation is in the works and I can see how it would translate quite well. I'll be reading David Almond's Clay next. (The TPL has given me a stack of books all at once and I wonder if I'll manage to get thru 'em.)

Today: A pumpkin patch with Erino and S'rain since it's autumn, officially.

TV TK: The Office starts up again this week and you can bet I am happy about that. Bet on it. It's a safe bet. Tho I am reluctant (and have already missed ep. #1), I think I shall try ANTM again this cycle. It will be awful and exactly as it has been for eight cycles but but but so hard to look away. Have I expressed my undying love for Weeds? I am rewatching S.1 with R. and just saw the episode that ends with Selia (sp?) saying, "I took a lude." Oh it knocks my socks off.

The font is now bigger as per K's request. Too big or just right?

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Horse lamp a good idea? Neigh.

This poor horsey is trapped in a furniture store at King & Parliament. Some mean-spirited prankster put a lampshade on an otherwise regal creature's head. Why? Also: spooky. More Horse Lamp pictures here on my flickr page

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Wha?

what happened to all the pink? CHANGE happened, people. We'll see if this template's a winner or not but I was tired of looking at all those hues of rose. So now we are cleaned up. White-washed. But without the negative connotations.

Which reminds me (the template change does), at ECW we've launched our new website. It's way better than before (but perhaps a few bugs linger? yes of course. let me know if you find one+). Have a look see.

Today I will make a lasagna. Today I will read a very tres bon manuscript that will, in fall 2008, be a very tres bon book. Today I will get rid of some cobwebs. Today I will think about my superpal who is ready to give birth to a baby boy predestined to have excellent taste in TV and books. Today I will be studying for the upcoming Tori Amos concert. Today I will be so much better than before.

**and one more thing on this historic day of change: calhoun.tumblr.com.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Awwww. EXTERMINATE.

Sharelle of I Guess We'll Just Have to... sent me links to some seriously serious Dr. Who crafts (some edible). Erino is going to fall off her chair when she sees these.



I think I forgot to blog about the Day of the Daleks. Did I? Well, feel better about the world looking at these pictures. (Also courtesy of Sharelley. For someone who claims not to watch the show...)

Thursday, September 13, 2007

pray for jackie's strength

Tori Amos sang a song for Brit. Haven't listened to it yet but you can hear it here (*new link ... no longer to nasty celebrity blog).

Britney, they set you up
But you drank from their cup
Britney, they set you up
Oh, but this is what it looks like, love,
This is what is looks like


When a star falls down
When a star falls down


Well, maybe you’re a mother
But you still need your mother
Yes, I may be a mother
But I still need a mother
To pick me up
Yes, to pick me up


When it all falls down
When it all falls down


Britney, they set you up
Is your contract winding up?
But you drank from the cup
Boy, this is what it looks like
Yes, I said, this is, this is what it looks like, Disney, yes


When a star falls down
When a star falls down


You may be a mother
Baby, you still need a mother
Yes, I may be a mother
But I still need a mother
To pick me up
Yes, to pick me up


When it all falls down
When it all falls down
When it all falls, all falls down
When it all falls down


(thanks Clazza)

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

grumpy mcStopherson

my holiday is over.
***
oh brit-brit. too much too soon, my darlin.
but it's the media/bloggers reactions to her that makes me saddest of all. it's all so nauseatingly shallow and mean. total idiocy.
***
i may be getting a cold.
***
reading Strangers on a Train and going loony as a result. part of my new(ish) plan: I Read Your Favourite Authors. there are far far too many choices out there so y'all can be my guides. And the good thing is for someone who reads a lot, there's a lot i haven't read. so chances are your recommendation will be novel to me. so send 'em in.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

flashlight dream

over in the county of hastings, where i spent my long weekend, the local rock station played "Roxy Roller." We immediately took to it and Clazza's found a video of it and I've discovered that it was a Juno-winning song for Sweeney Todd, a glam rock band from Vancouver (a phrase I haven't written before) and then was covered by Suzi Quatro. That's the version we heard on that super rock long weekend. A quick look at the lyrics suggests that our heroine, Roxy, is a hooker: Roxy Roller / Five-bob job / She gets bubble-gum on her knees / Down between the seats. Oh Roxy Roller.

Sharelle
blogged about this a while back but I've taken to using it so shall mention it here. Musicovery — for when you are tired of your own music or can't think of what the fuck to listen to. It provides ya with songs by people you forgot you liked and songs by people you really should like.

Musicovery is a pretty little webradio application that allows users to select the music they would like to listen to based on various parameters. Click a point in the “matrix” of the calm/energetic and dark/positive axes to determine the mood of the music you want to listen to. Also select by genre, decade and popularity. A click in the neighborhood of “calm” and “positive” within the “electro” genre spawned a pretty little organic blossom of…wait for it…calm and positive electronic music


While I'm pilfering Sharelle's blog, let's mention the Thomas Allen pulp fiction cover stand-ups. I think they are marvy and may have to get myself his book, which Sharelle tells us is called
Uncovered. More at Foley Gallery.

In our town of Flinton, Clairey, S'rain, and I went to a flea market, which was more like a trunk sale with some perma stands. A lot of mason jars on sale, but also a dried-grass parking lot full of cassette tapes and books. Two copies of Paula Abdul's remix album
Shut Up and Dance (i already have it so didn't get it), a million Heart tapes, Chris Sheppard, George Michael.... S'rain went for the Corey Hart and early Michael Jackson. Claire found a Fred Astaire CD. I added to my Dylan Thomas collection and now own two recordings of Under Milk Wood, this one a BBC production with Richard Burton. I listened to the first half last night and it's quite magical and funny. Funnier than I remember. As far as I can tell, it's the 1954 recording but you can hear the 1963 one here. Also for 25 cents apeach, The Ice Age (Margaret Drabble) and Lolita (Vladimir Nabokov). Plus three not-so-torrid romance novels for cabin reading. Flipping through one, Dearest Traitor, for the naughty bits, I came across the best-ever whispered sweet nothing. Our heroine Georgina is being overpowered by the ferocious Stephen. He reaches up under her sweater and says something like, "Your breasts are soft and supple, warm like a kitten." I urge my boob-caressing readers to try this out on a lady friend in the near future. PLEASE. If you can keep a straight face.

And I've finished Hairy Potts Numero 7 so feel free to discuss the ending with me whenever you please. I felt compelled to read it as fast as possible but must admit that I don't really care for any of the characters and was accordingly not that invested. Also I had le grand pleasure of telling Claire what I would have included in the last book if I were J.K. and was right on track with most of it. Minus the crap epilogue (crapilogue). And the bit about a character called Crissy Calhoun riding in on her horse Thunderbuckeroo (borrowed from S'rain) to save the day by leading Dumbledore's Army and the Death Eaters in a spontaneous yet perfectly synchronized dance routine that unites them all. And you best believe we'd have a laser light show with all those wands, jazzing it up. Quite the show.

Now reading Daniel Handler's Watch Your Mouth. The cover is AWFUL but the text is molto bene thus far. I guess that's one more point for not judging a book by its cover.

Well that's enough for now. wouldn't ya say?

Saturday, September 01, 2007

pilfered from email

Field Report, FanExpo 2007

Sadly we didn't run into each other, Commander.
I wandered around with my nerdly bro-in-law Richie for hours on end and took some stellar photos with my cruddy camera. The Guitar Hero competition was a surprise delight -- there is something so endearing about watching a 13 year old rock out on a plastic guitar, entirely shy but performing nevertheless. I went to (count 'em) TWO Q&A's -- Adam West and our darling Charisma Carpenter. Both of whom are charming and funny. It turns out Charisma and I are indeed two separate people tho I don't have the photo evidence to prove it. (Unless a photo I took with her a tiny spec in the bg proves it. No, I didn't think so.)

My favourite thing is the people all dressed up and in particular the families of cos-players. I think I'll be going back today but am scared I will spend all my moolah on geeky merchandise like buffy and angel playing cards, BSG t-shirts, Dr. Who piggy banks, a lifesize metal Terminator statue, ....

Super
fantastic.

The Calhouninator.

*********************

Dear Da,

I hope that your football match is brilliant and exciting and that your team wins and also practices wells beforehand.

Never have I read Joyce Oates. Everyday it seems someone mentions a book or a writer that I have not read. I should keep a master list with me of the book recommended, and by whom, and try to get my way through it eventually. It seems infinite.

I am reading the last Harry Potter book in an effort to finish it before I am spoiled by spoilers. So far so good. It's more exciting than the last one and really that's all they offer a reader of my age. My old old age. Then I have two library books to read: another children's book but by Clive Barker and then an adult book by a writer best known for his children's books (Lemony Snicket). And I've just finished reading A Wrinkle in Time — that's one I couldn't believe I'd made it this far without encountering.


I agree about the preening and pruning people with their Warhol haircuts. Shudder. Some of them are likely to leave Londontown and descend on our town for the film festival. Those uniformed folks with badges and cellphones and, it used to be, black turtlenecks.

Alas poor Yorick. I had a dream last night that I could see you on the street out my window and you were doing a crazy dance, like that Italian clowning you like (but I find frightening). I think it was because Claire, Adam, and I looked at photos last night — among them you dancing on the street in New Orleans with the hobo, first thing in the morning, painter's cap on.

Today we're going up to the cabin. S'rain has lots of work to do she has mentioned and Claire and I have lots of reading work to do. Mine more fun than Claire's. She is studying for her mba and I am reading (experimental) fiction written by Daccia, daughter to George, who you've likely met once or twice. And next week I'm off from work. Shall wander about town with Claire and perhaps get some dullish practical things done too. Leaky faucet and all that.

Love, cheers, ehm, loose chippings, & tartan umbrellas,
Ella

Friday, August 31, 2007

holiday: night the first

i am officially on holiday. i am officially glad as a garbage bag. that is officially one of my new phrases. clazza gee came over for visitations at the Casa. it was nice. we fought valiantly against the raccoons and maybe won. also we took some photos of ourselves looking not quite like ourselves. witness:

For the record, here's what pops into my head when i say "witness"

witness the quickness as i kick this / i'm on a mission so listen as i dis-miss / all this negativity for taking a stand cause we're five bad brothers from the beantown land / no sell-out so get the hell out / we do it our way / who gives a damn about what critics say / said we wouldn't last, said our time was past, said we're just a flash / but we're still kicking a-- / the d-o-n-n-i-e the w a-h-l to the berg has spoken .../ and to the non-believers, i say peace / stop playing those games / boi / hahaha / ah yeah.

I kinda lose the lyrics in the spelling bit but otherwise. Yowza.

Happy holidays to me.

**All clear in the a.m., the "Games" remix: the d-o-n-n-i-e, the w a-h-l to the b-e-r-g / has spoken / and now the games must cease / and to the non-believers, i say peace ... and so on.

gimme gimme never gets

Dear darlin Brit Brit has a new song and you can hear it here -- it's called "Gimme More" and I advise you to only listen to that one and ignore the other, further down the page. That one is like a D-side that should never have seen the light of day (featuring noises that sound like my cell phone ringing). The main one, though, is classic Brit and that means I heart it and look forward to having future dance parties to it.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

here's what i know

or at least some of what i know, today . . .

no matter how hard we all try things always get messy and messed up. it's like fighting the Nothing or the Darkness, raging for the light. of coursey on a horsey, it's worth it but goddamnit sometimes.

no matter how hard I try to make sensible romantic choices i can't seem to fall in love with anyone who is free to fall in love with me. and bravely maintaining friendships can be a bit crushing at times. (today just might be one of those times, yes oh yes indeed.)

and no matter who I disappoint, no matter who I please, there will never cease to be windy days like these.

p.s. I think I shall get my tattoo next week while I'm on holiday from work. stay tuned.

p.p.s. I've just finished A Wrinkle in Time and add it to that list of books for my unborn children's library.
p.p.p.s. free sandwiches are nice when you're feeling broke and blue.

Monday, August 27, 2007

shakespeare at my wedding

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

i wonder if that means me

when asked who my favourite writers were, on the spot i could only come up with virginia woolf. surely i have more? my problem lies, i think, in not keeping track of things. so here's a first try, from what i could sleuth, sitting across from my piecemeal bookshelf:

the dubliners, james joyce.
the great gatsby, f. stop fitzgerald (no amount of fire or freshness can challenge what a man will store up in his ghostly heart).
of course our Adeline Virginia Stephen Woolf: the waves, mrs dalloway, a room of one's own.
his dark materials, philip pullman.
the torn skirt, rebecca godfrey.
the bell jar, sylvia plath.
"fern hill," dylan thomas
the perks of being a wallflower, stephen chbosky.
hamlet.
lisa moore, open and alligator.
their eyes were watching god, zora neale hurston.
"the yellow wallpaper," charlotte perkins gilman.
the giraffe and the pelly and me, roald dahl.

(and the list will only grow. do let me know if i've forgotten something i love dearly.)

Thursday, August 23, 2007

blogspree

1. Dinosaur book nostalgia (via bookninja). i should look up the weird books i had as a kid and prove they existed. there was one about getting vaccines where a guy totally gets rabies and has to have a massive needle. my mom denied its existence recently. i'll show her.

2. Slush Pile nostalgia (via quillblog).

3. flowchart from erin nicole:

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

liquidlamesaucebox. nuts.

what is an adjective if not sauce poured on a noun to give it some flava?
i am (re)introducing a few word combinations into my vocabulary.

lamesauce
. as far as i know, i made that one up. adam was watching america's got talent and it just happened: this is lame...sauce. i think it works because the word itself is lame(sauce) and therefore provides the speaker with a degree of pleasure in its utterance as well as some much needed humility.

next up: saucebox. inspired by Samuel Richardson's epistolary novel Pamela (1740), which is such a dreadful moralistic bore. the only was to get thru it is by by calling everyone and thing a saucebox as you read it, much like our Pamela is so called (and worse) by everyone in the lamesauce book.

and finally, liquid nuts! t-rex made this one up and it is to be used as an intensifier. actually it's just the liquid part (as in "liquid heresy!") but liquid nuts as a phrase is too f'n good not to use ALL the time.

may i also suggest combining terms in one super crackin sentence? e.g., "Superbad was 50 percent liquid nuts, 50 percent lamesauce!" (that is my actual opinion on the film, fyi.)

ah crud. i may have thought up lamesauce but so did gamillions of other people. now i am the one who is lamesauce. liquid lamesauce.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

bien agiter

if you were a regular at the diner where i was both proprietor and short-order cook, you would know when you order the omelette, your meal would actually be scrambled eggs. but it sure would come as a surprise to the new customers.

the house special would, of course, have nothing to do with eggs but would be a fascinating variety of cheese melts and grilled cheeses. also excellent coffee in perfect little cups (free refills) and a proper orange juice glass and very proper orange juice. in the spring and summer, we'd have homemade lemonade and a very delicious traditional pimm's at the ready, always.

the seats would be turquoise, at least the twisty stools along the counter. and there would be big windows at the front that open all the way, likely doors when I think of it, so in the summer it would be breezy and warm. of course this diner would be in that dimension erin & i were discussing where 7 months of the year the weather is 26 degrees, sunny and breezy. (plus one month for winter, one month for fall, one for spring, 3 weeks of hot-hot summer, the remaining 5 weeks are wild card weather.)


and also we'd have the best milkshakes and cheeseburgers outside of In 'n' Out Burger.

what am i talking about? i do not know but i can seriously picture this diner and it's great there. fret not i have no aspirations to be a proprietor/short-order cook and i do not possess the skillz to pull it off. see above re: omelette. i do have the skillz to make myself a cuppa tea and settle down which is what i shall do right NOW.

Monday, August 20, 2007

embarrassment of riches

birthday fest 2007 is now officially over. it was a good run this year full of delights and wonderment.

  • i saw many pals and talked to my far-from-home pals, all of whom continue to be super excellent choices for pals;
  • i received many stellar presents and a collection of attractive greeting cards;
  • i met Mr. Ryan North of Dinosaur Comics fame and lost the power of speech but found the power of swoon;
  • my hair got chopped in a pleasing fashion (the bangs are back; no more hairbands for me);
  • for three days in a row, i did zero work;
  • my nails are neon pink & the colour has turned out to be quite the conversation starter;
  • several meals were (i presume) lovingly prepared for me & they were all tasty and no doubles;
  • i converted R. to Weeds plus bought S.2 for me;
  • at tcaf, i discovered a softer world and now have two webcomics to read religiously and if i discover a brill comic every time i go to one of these festivals i will soon be out of time but full of joy;
  • i signed up for a ballet class in september w/ (work, not dr.) Sarah;
  • erin nicole & i shopped in a store intended for pre-teens (again!);
  • my sister got me with the best prank-by-post yet, one 6 months in the making (well mostly in the waiting but that is the hardest part);
  • two new things are on my bedroom walls: mr. rory calhoun and three birds;
  • i did not see any of my immediate family members on my birthday (this is not a good thing, but is filed in the 'interesting' category) and the last time that happened was on my 16th birthday -- i was at camp being a counselor (tho my campers were only 9 mths, tops, younger than me) and we were on a canoe trip and i entirely forgot it was my birthday until late at night when someone sang some song with birthday in it (no, not 'happy birthday') and then i was all, no way! and amie was all, oops! -- oh no wait, the birthday i spent in london with claire qualifies too, i must be getting dotty in my old age; and
  • cupcakes, long islands, irish car bombs, and the impeachment of bush.
what more could a girl ask for?

to know how to make the not-equal sign on a mac, that is what she could ask for. geeeez. so many times i find myself wanting to type, x
≠ y, where x = noun and y = adjective (for example). well, once again googling provides me with answers: it's "option =" for ≠! get ready for a lot of things to ≠ here at the tribune!

whew.