Sunday, December 31, 2006

make an assessment.

if you haven't watched the Old Gregg video I posted a few weeks ago, do do do. it's mental and hilarious and i am likely to never stop saying things from it. (it's from the mighty boosh for those that wonder about such things.)

back from the rock, back on the mainland. had my non-chrimbo family dinner and presents. twas much fun. ham dinner. mustard presents. i've been spoiled and spoiled and spoiled with all the brillo gifts this year.

tis now the day of the eve of the new year. i am cleaning up the apartment un petit peu parce que Nadine & Claire are coming by round 5/6 to get ready, have some dinner, and then off we go to Sarah & Dave's NYE partee. twill be funtastic. tangfastic.

ladies brunch yesterday:(the gang minus Mum B, who was taking the picture.)

listening to RunDMC and later Spice Girls. They are perfect for celebrating new year's. So peppy.

so many things to update on but never the bloggin time. want to do n.y. resolutions...maybe on the 1st. happy new year from the Calhouner to you and yours. xoxo

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Carbonear: Day 4.5

boxing day on the rock. bailey's in your coffee. orange for breakfast. ham and potatoes at 1 p.m. trip to port-aux-graves to see the chrimbo-light boats this evening. laze about in between.

as an advance warning: i received both Brit-Brit's Fantasy perfume and Paris's Evil perfume (a joke vial from R.) for Chrimbo. please note that if I smell like a sugary sweet whore the next time you see me, that is why. i only took one little whiff of the paris scent but am scared cause ... well... it smelled good. lord help me.

round up of chrimbo presents in the book/cd/dvd category:
killing yourself to live (chuck k.)
the subtle knife (philip p.) [erin this means you can finally have your copy back. sarsy.]
darkly dreaming dexter [the book Dexter was based on...Nikki, you can totally borrow this]
illustrated collected works of jane austen
sudoku puzzle book
goldfrapp supernature
veronica mars soundtrack
weeds season 1 [which elinor reid says is uber good]

also leanner and i played the same stocking joke on each other. we are now wearing little necklaces from walmart: hers says "frisky" and mine says "hottie" and there is one little rhinestone in the elegant script. i am also wearing one that says "kristina" (better than "christina").

so to wrap up, when i return to the mainland, i will smell like paris hilton and be wearing bling. the end.

Sunday, December 24, 2006

cristmas wrapping

there was no sing-song yesterday but this morning, Richie, Leanner and I had a spontaneous sing-along of Little Mermaid songs. Who knew they knew all the words just like me? Twas brilliant. We started with "Part of Your World," moved onto "Under the Sea" and wrapped things up with "Kiss Da Girl."

today we will be decorating a gingerbread train (!) and wrapping up presents. i have a few crafty things still to do and keep putting them off. soon i will run out of time and ruin chrimbo (again).

last night's dinner at Riiiiiiiiick's was so delicious and a change from the usual fare. i learned the difference between lamb, sheep, and mutton (we had sheep, Tash, not lamb). the chicken dish was spicy and delightful. mango rice. delicious little samosas.

back at the ranch, we watched Little Miss Sunshine, which was quite lovely; i'd been meaning to see it since way back when. then some ali g. then to sleep.

i had a dream i was leonard cohen's new editor. we were having an event in a giant candlelit warehouse with TINARS and Audrey was there. instead of doing the event after publication of the book, it was an event to start off the writing process. def. unusual. then leonard put his arm around me in a gentlemanly romantic way and we were in love. of course i had to leave him for just a moment in dreamland and before i could return, i woke up and couldn't get back in.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

live from the Rock

here we are, in the Rock. (on the Rock?) it's only Day 2 (day 1.5, really, especially with the 1.5 hr difference) and already we have had way tooooo much food. don't worry, more eating is planned for 6 p.m. (4:30 EST).

we traveled on the busiest travel day of the whole year (as i was told numerous times) and it went off w/o a hitch. except for the scary, turbulent, zero-visibility landing in st. john's. luckily i am armed with my From the Flight Deck knowledge, so I knew we were being guided by some jazzy machine on the ground and were very unlikely to crash into that ground.

snowstorm in and around st. john's made for some treacherous, in-the-dark, unknown-land, curvy-roads driving. leanna was a superstar. it's crazy how dark it gets here. no light except for the sporadic on-coming traffic. compared to my bedroom at night, where i can see every little thing from the street and buildings on king, it is intensely black.

jade the dog was very excited to see us but did not show her excitement with pee this year (thank you jadey). new house which looks almost like the last house only cozier. the Bunny in a Dress still covers the vacuum cleaner, rest assured.

today -- a trip to Walmart. a dinner at cousin Rick's. he has traveled the world and will be making us some fancy foreigner food. full report tomorrow. hoping to have a wander by the bay along the boardwalk. it's not so cold today and getting out and about will be gooooood.

also...the bed is an electric magic vibrating bed. rather stiff and weird but very good for getting hysterical as it folds in two and keeps us there.

there is a piano here and R is trying to figure out how to play "beautiful." perhaps we will have a sing-song later. Awesomeville, NFLD.

Thursday, December 21, 2006

old greg

Get ready for the seriously crazy.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

pre-holiday day

today Clairey G. and I had a lovely day. we were a bit slow and headachy and indecisive but we achieved almost all the items on our pre-planned itinerary with added bonuses too. we both got our hair chopped and we ate grilled cheese sandwiches and did lots of queen w wandering. and lotsa chrimbo gifts were purchased.

watched funny things on youtube like the J.Timberlake dick in a box short and the weirdest thing you'll ever see, a british comedy skit called Old Greg. I'll find links one day but seeing as my laptop is about to run out of juice, it'll have to wait.

jordan knight, former member of NKOTB, was on Identity tonight and it was rather sad. he just stood there like a d-list celebrity. i used to love you, jordan knight, even though i was supposed to love joey.

flippin laundry time. will do my best to blog from carbonear.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Steve Martin's Wishes

If I had one wish that I could wish this holiday season, it would be that all the children to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace.

If I had two wishes I could make this holiday season, the first would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace. And the second would be for 30 million dollars a month to be given to me, tax-free, in a Swiss bank account.

You know, if I had three wishes I could make this holiday season, the first, of course, would be for all the children of the world to get together and sing, the second would be for the 30 million dollars every month to me, and the third would be for encompassing power over every living being in the entire universe.

And if I had four wishes that I could make this holiday season, the first would be the crap about the kids, definitely, the second would be for the 30 million, the third would be for all the power, and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year to have an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought out slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina-somebody, I can't think of her name. Of course my lovely wife can come too and she's behind me one hundred percent here, I guarantee it.

Wait a minute, maybe the sex thing should be the first wish, so if I made that the first wish, because it could all go boom tomorrow, then what do you got, y'know?

No, no, the kids, the kids singing would be great, that would be nice.
But wait a minute, who am I kidding? They're not going to be able to get all those kids together. I mean, the logistics of the thing is impossible, more trouble than it's worth! So -- we reorganize!

Here we go:
First, the sex thing. We go with that. Second, the money. No, we got with the power second, then the money. And then the kids.

Oh wait, oh jeez, I forgot about revenge against my enemies!
Okay, I need revenge against all my enemies, they should die like pigs in hell! That would be my fourth wish.

And, of course, my fifth wish would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace. Thank you everybody and Merry Christmas.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006


feels like chrimbo hols have almost arrived.

sales conference dunzo. a few more days of real hardcore work -- soon Flight Deck
will be off my hands, kinda funny cause it's my first real edit -- and then Claire arrives (!), always a sign of good things to come. Cranium office party on Monday, which if 1/10 as fun as last year will be awesome; Wednesday off work to roam the streets w/ Clairey (and recover from her annual party the eve before), and Friday off to Carbonear, NFLD.

and tomorrow the party at the CFA, where I will sport my Official Party Dress for the third but not final time. (deciding to wear the same thing to every party was a really good idea.)

tonight i am zahsted...perhaps the perfect time to watch the finale of top model. especially since nikki and i have decided to put the cw into ecw and do a line of authorized books with the fabbity-fab network. of course this idea exists only in our heads (and hearts) but just you wait...

since i'm in the christer spirit, a list of my favourite chrimbo things:

favourite christmas movie
Die Hard
runners-up: Elf, National Lampoon one, and the Rudolph one with the Land of Misfit Toys

favourite christmas song
"Somethin' Stupid" -- Nikki K & Robbie Williams

runners-up: "Christmas Wrapping" -- Spice Girls version (the Waitresses are perty darn good too); "Little Drummer Boy/That other song...." David Bowie & Bing Crosbie?

favourite SNL xmas skit
Dysfunctional Family Christmas Album ad ("daddy's voice is gruff and funny / daddy's nose is red and runny / the only words i understand are 'god' and 'damn' and 'christmas'!")

runners-up: Steve Martin's wishes; Dan Ackroyd's Bag o' Glass

favourite things I have at christmas
(and rarely the rest of the yr)

clementines, bailey's, Diane's tortiere, nuts cracked open with a nutcracker, ferrero rocher (sp?), and best of all -- long stretches of uninterrupted hang-outs with Claire!

addendum: guess what movie is starting on citytv right this second? die hard!

Monday, December 11, 2006

You stood there so brave / You used to be shy

Lists. It's been a while since we've had those here at the Tribune.

Songs I can't stop listening to:

1. This Isn't It -- Giant Drag

2. Take It Easy (Love Nothing) -- Bright Eyes
3. Black Cherry -- Goldfrapp
4. Gold Lion -- Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs
5. Where Is My Mind -- The Pixies
6. One Day I'll Fly Away -- Nikki K from Moulin Rouge
7. Emperor's New Clothes -- Sinead O'Connor
8. Chasing Cars -- Snow Patrol (I know it's lame but so perfect sometimes...)
9. You Only Live Once -- The Strokes

Things that are gross:
1. mr. noodles (chicken flava), even when you're rather hungry
2. people horking out the streetcar window (this happens at least once every two days and by people I mean men cause I've never see a woman do it)
paris hilton and that article will tell ya why
4. random nice old man on the phone ruining it w/ random racist comment
5. bad things happening to people i know and love far too frequently

Things that are brilliant:
1. tattoos
2. chrimbo parties
3. bailey's and milk or bailey's in your a.m. latte on a satur-/sun-day (not on a work day...i'm not there yet)
4. tulips in december (thank you tash)
5. a 17-yr-old girl writing a spoken word piece (is that different than a poem?) that reminds me-now so much of me-then, it's bonkers
6. when Ola calls me Siouxsie
7. being inexplicably smirky.

Saturday, December 09, 2006


"I'm here to talk to you television about the monetizing of today broadcast."
"Was any of that usable?"

nikki was kind enough to burn me a dvd of the last ep. of ANTM; haven't watched it yet but she also included the clip from 30 rock of the Alec Baldwin character's outtakes filming the Product Integration promo. it makes everything in the universe better. except i forgot that i was starving and left my toast sitting there for ages. and cold toast sorta defeats the goodness power of toast. snap.

sunny saturday morning. i stayed in last night and did very important things like cleaned up my room and did some NWA keying (no, not Straight Outta Compton NWA or the airline but the National Wrestling Alliance). and up this a.m. like a chipper person who wakes up every Saturday morning and crosses things off her list of things a faire. quick trip to the office to pick up all the stuff i forgot yesterday and now back home to workey work until party time. amie has absolved me of my cupcake making duties. assigned booze buying instead. i know how to do that.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

dr. spaceman

"i am a stabbing robot." 30 rock makes me laugh and laugh and then guffaw. dear tracy morgan, i heart you beaucoup and to the max.

last night was the workey chrimbo party featuring karaoke! even though we were missing key members of the ecw ace gang, it was still a good night and i did too much singing. self-nominated as person who embarrassed herself the most. ah not really. i am proud of my killer shaggy rapping skills. it's the only party trick i've gots.

on tuesday i went to a showcase at the cfa and this one girl did an original spoken word piece that nearly killed me with its geniousity. i hope i'll be able to get a copy from her cause i am dying to read it. wonder how it will be different reading it vs. seeing it performed. the whole eve was lovely. and filled the lonely veronica free hours quite nicely. it seems there really is a world out there when you turn off the telly. hmm.

amie's chrimbo party sat. night & am looking forward to that one. will wear my xmas party uniform. saw friend from the centennial-era this eve for a catch-up and while i was barely coherent, it was lovely to see her. more, encore.

now i think i'll be going to bed right this sec cause i missed out on some sleepers last night. don't have any hot cocoa available but sure could go for some.

Monday, December 04, 2006

we could be heroes

Tho' much is taken, much abides; and though
We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven; that which we are, we are;
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

problem solved

gingerbread maison

woke up later than i wanted to this morning. feeling kinda stressy, loads to do -- unless tasha successfully invented the time machine yesterday.

at my mum's, clearing out junk from my old room, since my bro's moved in and apparently doesn't want random piles of my stuff in his room.

thinking about how i'll never get everything done and what do i see in a dusty corner of a box? An old fortune cookie fortune:

You are busy but you are happy.
Right you are, fortune.

Now time for building a gingerbread house with S'rain and Oluh. That is more fun than dusty old books and weird relics of the 90s.