Thursday, November 30, 2006


"you wanna be on top?"

oh tyra. oh top model. last night's episode was wicked-funny. nothing better than absolute judge nonsense. this week that meant: really bad dancing and more free-from-reason antm logic. poor CariDee (blonde one pictured above for those of you not watching ANTM) (why aren't you watching ANTM?) got hypothermia in the cold Spanish pool and got in trouble for getting cold and bailing on the remainder of the photo shoot AND in trouble for staying in the pool too long to ensure she got a fierce photo (which she did). the lesson here is that no matter what you do, tyra is crazy and nigel hates you. so maybe this *is* a good crash course in the wacky world of fashion.

this photo shoot was very close to my heart (i heart water) & i think the only shoot i personally would have a chance at rocking (do not put me in the crazy wigs). i am very good at floating having spent hours of synchro practice doing just that -- perfecting my floating skillz AND dealing w/ cold pools. and in synchro, like in the world of Top Model, it is considered cheating if you rest your foot on the bottom of the pool. So I've got that rule down. and as tyra taught us last week, to be a top model is more about attitude than actual modelling talent or awesome photos. that's why Nikki and I are signing up for CNTM.

Two notable things about my trip home from work today:
1. I nearly got hit by a car.
Crossing at the intersection at Queen & Wineva, the white-man-walking sign says go. I start walking and there is an old lady crossing from the other side. She looks nice. She is carrying a Mastermind bag & I'm thinking "oh she just bought some nice present for her grandkid how sweet lalala." In comes fast-moving ugly red car. "He better slow down or he'll hit the nice old lady." But no he speeds up so much that I'm the target. I had to JUMP out of the way. (Cat-like reflexes.) And I yelled "Jesus!" really loud. Maybe offending nice old lady. Kinda jazzy part of being really scared: my first instinct was to memorize the license plate. Thank you Law & Order: SUV reruns. I am
2. Ricky Gervais podcast.
Nothing will make you feel better faster after a near-hit than listening to that thing. Holy mackerel it's frakin funny. I was on a crowded streetcar and could not stop laughing out loud. Whatever the stupid guy's name is, he is a genius. Watch The Office tonight cause this ep is written by that crew.

and just cause i love this photo shoot here's the other photo of dumb Melrose and dumb Eugena/Eugenia. Note Eugena's foot is on the bottom of the pool. Cheater!

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Pro, Con, Interesting

Why working at home is good:
1. Unlimited supply of free coffee
2. I can listen to Debussy as I work, which reminds me of my studious youth
3. Laundry can be laundered in the bg
4. Toasty sandwiches are available for lunching
5. I can stay in my PJs all the live long day
6. I can focus on my neglected book and get through the edit and feel oh-so-much-better

Why working at home is bad:
1. Unlimited supply of free coffee

2. Co-workers who aren't always in the office come into the office when I am not in the office and we could have been having a laugh talking about The Office
3. No outside, fresh air until 6 p.m. (until Erin is done work)
4. No S'bucks (until Erin is done work)
5. No outgoing mail from my work account (why lordy why?)
6. Desk chair at home is tres uncomfortable

Why working at home is interesting:
1. I have nothing for this section but felt obliged to add it. When I was in grade 4, we were taught these different systems for evaluating problems and the most basic was this: dividing things up between pro, con, and interesting and seeing what won. Is it a bad sign that I only remember the most basic system?? Yikes.

Veronica Mars is on tonight and it looks like the episode will be exciting and action-packed at the very least. we will find out if the show has gone off the rails or was just testing its viewership's patience. Cmon option 2.

so don't you bring me

there's a way better 6 minute version i couldn't post but ya get the idea...

Sunday, November 26, 2006

lesson the first

this weekend i (re)learned that it's good to do something that thinking about gives you a nervy b. cause it just might turn out to be fun and not weird at all. had a lovely friday with some of the Ace Gang playing Guts (sorta) and trying Sarah's sober patience. she has it in spades. saturday was spent with my darling Nadine. we ate lovely food (new brunch spot: morning glory) and had good chats and saw stranger than fiction. which was definitely worth seeing but not the bestest in the westest. there are some truly funny and charming moments. and will f. is his usual awesome self. i am still on my goldfrapp kick and need to acquire their entire body of work. currently at the cfa doing just a wee bit of work and then to r's for our first hang out in a bit. he has promised the "best dinner ever" and when has he not delivered? (not including the ravioli incident of 2004.) then some firefly so my weekend will not be whedon-free. and i re-learned one more thing this weekend: being flip for funny's sake is stupid.

if you do a google image search for Rory Calhoun, Erin's shrine pops up. (oh dear, there is a rehearsal here for some random play and rehearsals can be sooooooooooooo weird to overhear. time to go.)

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

rejection poem

regret to inform you,
unable to offer,
must refuse.
cannot admit
Regrettably unable
wish you every success.
make other plans.
-scraps of my letter from the UofT Faulty of Law Admissions Office, circa March 2004

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

list, list, oh list!

1. i dodged a barf trail on morning walk to the streetcar
2. joss whedon has 35 other myspace friends. i am #36. kick ass.
3. on sunday i made a pork roast and it was kinda f'n good.
4. i am behind on my book club book: the secret mitzvah of lucio burke
5. i have a great deal of work-work to do and lots of other non-work too.
6. i am inconsistently using end punctuation in this list.
7. after listening to the once more with feeling soundtrack lotsa times, it is stuck in my head. like a remix of all the songs into one super song, a couple lines from this one tossed in with a couple from that.
8. tomorrow morning someone will be shadowing me to learn how i do my job because they have to do the same job (well, some job title) at their company. hahahaha i say with a side of ohmigod-fear.
9. the title of this blog entry is a quotation from hamlet. (it might be incorrectly punctuated but what isn't today? goddamnit.)
10. i would like a hot chocolate please.
11. do you think i will go out this evening and buy milk (i'm all out)? or do you think i will not and instead not have a coffee right off the bat in the a.m.? keep in mind that i rediscovered this morning that i do get caffiene-deprived headaches.
12. this is the most important one: when i was cleaning my stove (see below) on the weekend, i emailed erin (hi. i'm cleaning my stove). then moments later she calls me, incredulous. why? cause she was cleaning her stove at that exact time too. wtf and omg. also tgif, lol, and ttfn.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

sunday morning

my flurry of blogging in october has subsided a bit. don't know why. apologies to my devoted readers.

this weekend i have done a bit of puttering around the apartment doing things i wanted to do 6 weeks ago. (weird that it's only been 6 weeks in the apt. amie asked yesterday and i was ready to say 2.5 months.) gave the bathtub the scrubbing of its life and then hung up the new shower curtain (it's "ivory"). for inspiration, i listened to no strings attached by my second fav. boy band (#1 = nkotb), *nsync. i find pop music from the 90s is the perfect soundtrack for cleaning. just bring the stereo's remote with you and skip the ballads. you will kiss the grime bye bye bye. yes. i just said that. and meant it.

this morning i attacked Front Right Burner. former tenants of the apt had covered the burner trays (you know the bit under the element) with aluminium foil, presumably so if something dribbled, they'd just switch up the foil and not have any scrubbing to do. (if anyone knows why else you'd cover perfectly attractive burner trays with foil, please let me know.) so now eons later, the foil is crazy -- crunchy, bubbly, adhered to the tray like a skin graft. and in the case of Front Right Burner, ready to catch fire. Turn that burner on and that "foil" smokes like a mofo. I wouldn't call myself an expert in fire hazards but this is one I can identify. No longer. Now it's sparkling and foil-free and the proudest Front Right Burner on King East.

and in other this-week-in-the-apt news, every morning i've added cinnamon to the coffee in the grand tradition of erin, kate, and heidi. it's vair tasty and worth it, despite the fact that cinnamon does not lend itself to tidy percolation.

the TPL has lent me the once more with feeling soundtrack and i just can't stop listening to "The Parking Ticket." so we'll end with a bit of Buffy dialogue, one of Russ's favourites, in honour of dirt.

WILLOW: It's magic. I'm drawing power from the earth to heal myself.

BUFFY: We're on the second floor.

WILLOW: You know Giles says everything's part of the earth. This bed. The air. Us.

BUFFY: Explains why my fingernails get dirty even when I don't do anything.
From the Buffyverse Dialogue DataBase
Oh and those burner trays are called "burner bowls."

Wednesday, November 15, 2006


my new favourite slayer*

*not including Buffy. Definitely including Kendra.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

very niiiiiiice

sometimes it's boring to read about other people's dreams but i just remembered mine and a big grin spread across my face (anyone else picturing the cheshire cat? shudder.)

so there was some sort of party/dinner at an outdoor courtyard restaurant/bar of a hotel. the party was OK but kinda boring. if andrey were there, we would have been talking favourite musical moment (not incl. the musical) in Buffy.

then i look up at the staircase of the hotel (glass enclosure, you can see people walking down to the lobby) and it's george clooney, matt damon (who emailed me yesterday, right Jen?), julia r., lalala cast of Ocean's Eleven, or I guess by now O's 13. people at the party are kinda murmuring ooooh celebrities look oooh. (also murmuring rhubarb rhubarb no doubt.) then my spidey senses tingle, i turn toward the entrance, and who do I see? Borat!!!

Yes. Borat. Better than George Clooney? Yes. I walk over and some folk-music-Kazakstan-style is playing. I take his hand and we start doing a spirited folk dance. (i swear to god i was quite good at this in dreamland. thank you square dancing parties from the late 80s.) even though he's all Borat, in character, there's a little twinkle in Sacha's eye letting me know it's all jokes and it's all just a character. anyway......we dance over to the bar and have a beer and the bartender gets in on the murmuring (that's borat rhubarb). anyway. whatever. i can see this dream is kinda lame in the telling. so let's just say, last night i had a very exciting dream full of folk dancing, Borat, ignoring handsome celebrities over less handsome ones, and i think Sacha and I were falling in love. OK? ok. the end.

now, i've been meaning to post this list since tuesday, but it will come in handy for all the celebrations taking place this weekend.

Britney Songs to Celebrate Britney's Freedom:
I've Just Begun (Having My Fun)
Autumn Goodbye
What It's Like (To Be Me)
What U See (Is What U Get)
Brave New Girl
(You Drive Me) Crazy (Stop Remix)

Britney Songs I Hope Britney Isn't Listening To:
...Baby One More Time
From the Bottom of My Broken Heart
Slave 4 U
Born to Make You Happy
Sometimes (no one should listen to this song. unless doing the dance routine. that = fun.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

claire's quizzers

Spell your name out in band names or singers

Christina Agulera
Spice Girls
Stones, Rolling
Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs

Old jeans, nearly torn. Black long tank dress with "I heart Crissy" emblazoned in sparkly blue and gold, new from S'rain and Ola. Socks, Sarains. Knickers, mine.

Water. Smoke.

Cold. Chilly. Brisk.

Very slightly drunk.

1) Hairspray
2) tasha's birthday gift
3) elmer's glue
4) a buffy chuppa-chup tin
5) four half-filled journals
6) a very Monet-esque painting my mum did
7) erin's copy of Chuck Klosterman IV


1) humour
2) smarts
3) attractiveness (hard to nail down physical specifics here)
4) Spike
5) a personal style (whatever that may be)
6) confidence (that should be #1)
7) similar thoughts on the world & how it should be run

Do You


Read the newspaper?:

Do Drugs?
Rarely. Now never but I would do something sometime before I die.

Have you ever:

Been in love?:

Had a medical emergency?:
Nope. Pneumonia when I was 5. But no.

Had surgery?

Swam in the dark?:

slept outdoors?

on radio/tv/film?

No to radio. Yes to TV. Protest coverage. Background Performer. Red carpet coverage in the bg, thank you sister. Film -- Ginger Snaps. And aforementioned bg.

Gotten lost in the woods?
Not really but enough that it was funny. In high park of all places. in the winter.

Do you have any gay/lesbian friends?

About You:

Brown leather with Ponies on it! Yes, Veronica, ponies.

Everyday more than once. I love it strong with hot hot milk.

Yes, the lady version of Angel. Sorta stolen from Russ's man's Angel.

In the last 24 Hours have you-.


Bought something:
Various Costco crap, Food and Drink, Movie Ticket (Borat)

Yes - all day any time S'Rain or Ola would say anything I'd sing some ass song that had some related word in it. Annoying? Yes.

Been kissed:

Talked to an ex:

Had a serious talk?

Missed someone:
Yes. More than one.

Hugged someone:
Yes. My sister.

Attend Church:
Hell no. I mean, no respectfully. No.


Thing you drank:

Place you went:
Sarah and Dave's

Person you kissed:
Um. Private?

Person you talked to:
Adam, who just arrived home

last questions

1. your name?

2. grandparents' first name?
Anne, Tom, Elizabeth and Zdz(ohgod i don't know how to spell my grandpa's name. we always called him grandpa ottawa and i can say his name. fuck.)

3. what songs do you sing in the shower?
Rarely. But whatever, anything.

4. what did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?:
Teddy bears on fire

6. What's in your pockets right now?
Not a thing

7.what colour are your bedroom walls?

8. Last thing that made you laugh?
Our game of "Guts" this eve

9. Nicknames your parents call you?
Chicken Little, Snake Bite, Ella

10. things you shout to stupid drivers?

11. How do you like your chocolate?
I'd like some hot chocolate on that kitkat

12. Others describe your butt as?
Ask them

13. describe your fingernails?

14. what will you be doing tomorrow?


Saturday, November 04, 2006


this week, i have had the distinct pleasure of saying to myself, as i pack my bag for the day: got my iPod, got my jPod.

in this month's issue of Wired (among interesting articles) i saw an ad -- Douglas Coupland endorsing some blackberry-esque product that he uses to work on his in-progress jPod tv show.

adam saw i was reading jPod and said hey i just reserved that from the liberry today and i'm one-millionth in line.

yesterday evening, i decide to show S'rain and Ola the pages I was "reading" in jPod where the first 100,000 digits of pi are printed with one rogue digit (the game is to find the rogue one). then S'rain says i am auditioning for a show called jPod on Monday.

then mere moments later, flipping thru channels we see a segment on eTalk Daily about the Giller Prize. they flash the jPod cover and note its utter lack of a nomination.

so now i get to finish reading the book and then read the script: "i love turtles."